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CRIMINALLY
INSANE
PLOT
The obese Ethel Janowski is released from a mental asylum into
the care of her grandmother. When Granny tries to curb Ethel's
eating habits, Ethel murders her and tries to cover it up. What
ensues is a massacre as Ethel does away with anyone that threatens
to expose her, or get in the way of her one passion....FOOD.
REVIEW
It's been said that any idiot with a camera can make a movie.
Today, just about any Joe-blow out there can get his hands on
state of the art equipment if he's willing to shell out the bucks.
As a result, the video market is now flooded with crap that only
vidiots like you and I will even give a second thought to.
Somehow, I believe that Steve Millard, the creator of this fine
movie, is one of those idiots with a camera. With a John Waters-
inspired script and his mother in the producer chair, Mr. Millard
crafted a sixty-minute, 16mm crapshoot that probably went straight
to the drive-in or less discriminating movie houses. I bet that
nobody involved had high aspirations, but over the years, it
became sort of a cult wonder, even spawing a sequel. Make no mistake,
"Criminally Insane" is one of those "so-bad-it's-good" movies...
but upon repeated viewings I found it also to be very humorous,
smart, and even a little disturbing. Thank god for that idiot with
a camera who occasionally makes these types of movies.
Priscilla Alden is quite the marvel as Ethel. Granted, she's no
Meryl Streep, but she carries the movie and I found myself really
liking the character. Ethel is a woman who knows what she wants out
of life and is content with it...she even tells her grandmother "My
heart is just fine as long as my stomach is full"...amen to that. In
fact, Ethel is probably the most content person in this film, compared
to everyone else. Her grandmother is a crotchety old recluse who
shuts out her (nosy) neighbours, her sister Rosalie is an abused
prostitute who can't tell her pimp/boyfriend to take a hike, and her
doctor is a pushy bastard who insists that she resume shock treatment
after being released.
The story is pretty similar to that of the 1971 Spanish thriller,
"Cannibal Man". After being denied access to her food, Ethel kills her
grandmother in a fit of rage. Just like the main character in
"Cannibal Man", she locks the body up in a room and has to murder the
assorted folks who pop out of the woodwork to interfere. Ethel goes to
hilarious lengths to maintain her shit. After finishing all the food in
the house, she calls the local grocery and has more delivered. When she
discovers that she has no money, she murders the delivery boy with a
ketchup bottle! Things get increasingly difficult for Ethel as her
grandmother's bedroom turns into a dumping ground for dead bodies. Her
sister comes to stay and notices the foul odor (Ethel tries to cover up
the stink with various air fresheners), her doctor comes by to find out
why she's missed shock treatment, and there's a nosy detective who's
investigating the disappearance of the delivery boy.
In a nutshell, "Criminally Insane" is an endearing horror movie if you
don't take it too seriously and embrace it's flaws. It's amateurish,
unbelievable, and silly...but it's so much damn fun! It's kind of like
stepping into an alternate reality, and there are certain instances where
it feels like you're watching some sort of deranged art-house movie.
Watch for the very end surprise twist.
GORE
More like red paint, but we can pretend. I guess you could say that this
is gory only in the campiest way. Ethel uses various implements like a
butcher knife, a bottle, a candelabra, and a hatchet. The scene where she
goes after her sister is pretty good.
SOUNDTRACK
Odd experimental stuff that actually sets a mood. Sounds mostly like
various instruments doing their hatchet work...but for some strange reason it fits.
BOTTOM LINE
Check it out...a lot of people will dismiss it, but those who get into it
will love it. Overall, an audacious attempt at camp horror, done lovingly
and with spirit.
Review
By: The ScareMaker
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