Midges In Space Story
* ~` The Prequel
~`*
greyzone
I Made It Back!!
Wed Jul 25 00:28:12 2001
Wheeee... Who needs Rollerblades when you can strap banana peels
to your boots?? Hi Monkey! Hi Dark! Hi Mr. S. Squirrel and Mr?
Armageddon!! I just skidded in from Terra Incognita, North of 39.
Where did you say the refreshments are, can I get anyone
something while I'm there? 8 ) Boy, it's great to be here in one
piece today. It's just been one crash after another and to feel
myself on terra firma is a relief. OK, So what you wanta talk
about??
Monkey!
terra firma
Wed Jul 25 06:50:02 2001
HI Greyzone, This is terra firma...really!?? I had no idea, and I
still don't!?!?? So yea, jus help yerself to anything ya can find
for refreshments, it's on the house! I see that Dark has already
gotten into Squirrel's root beer, I better warn him to go easy on
that stuff!!!!!HeHeHe
thedarkone
Re: I Made It Back!!
Wed Jul 25 04:53:47 2001
How about we just sit here and contemplate things quietly.
.......................................
.......................................
Jade
contemplating
Wed Jul 25 06:56:22 2001
Hey Dark, It's nice to see ya! :-) Yea, you jus sit there quietly
contemplatin...and try ta stay out of trouble! ;-)
thedarkone
oooommmmmooommmmm
Thu Jul 26 00:00:54 2001
oooommmmm...ooommmmm
Jade
nice try...
Thu Jul 26 08:36:21 2001
Yer not foolin me any Dark, it just isn't like ya to sit and
comtemplate yer navel! ;-) OOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMM.....
greyzone
that sound is the .......
Fri Jul 27 00:08:31 2001
That sound is not the contemplation of navels. I had the most
phenominal revelation! I have discovered the SPEED OF DARK!!! It
was staring me in the face for years. One assumes that if the
speed of light goes in one direction, then dark, being the
opposite, will go in the other direction. Well Einstein eat your
socks!! You will find that the [speed of dark = (speed of light +
n)]. The speed of dark starts where light leaves off and thats
the sound you hear from Dark. ?}-)
thedemonsmonkey
The Speed Of Dark
Sun Jul 29 12:28:30 2001
Quite an interestin hypotheses on Dark, there Greyzone...would be
interesting to hear his theories on the Greyzone.....
thedemonsmonkey
lost in space
Fri Jul 27 07:51:28 2001
Ya kinda lost me, I got as far as Dark goin in the opposite
direction...oh wait, he's goin in the same direction a differant
way, a Dark way...okay I've got it now!?? *-)
thedarkone
and the noble peace prize goes to...
Fri Jul 27 08:51:04 2001
And the noble peace prize goes to...
GREYZONE! The international conferance of big brain types jump to
their feet in a standing ovation. What's next for this world
class smart guy you ask??? Trying to figger out what dark is
going to do with all that jello and jet fuel!?!
thedarkone
you dont want to know
Posted 7-27-2001 07:44
Oh man I couldn't tell ya or I'd have to kill ya! Let's just say
it involves,
a 10 gallon bucket of mayo,
a body bag full of jello,
three midgets,
6 rolls of duct tape,
an electric generator,
a watermelon,
a tanker truck full of jet fuel
and 538 pounds of bananas!
so do you really want to know what were gonna use em for??? No.
Ok then that's what I thought.
greyzone
gz's Theory
Sun Jul 29 00:29:49 2001
Dark's Hideous Weapon:
Some kinda explosive propulsion device to alter the earth's
trajectory by altering the rotational speed and axis to
precipitate the Apocalypse as follows:
1. A tanker truck full of jet fuel - programable exhaust stacks
swivel mounted with 90 degree trajectory adjustments (operated by
one midget), programable valves to divert exhuast to pressure-pump
electric generator, sparking the jet fuel, tanker has brakes on
a 10 gallon bucket of mayo, - lubricates the stacks (requires one
midget)
a watermelon, - initial packing to maximize pressure of primary
booster blast
and 538 pounds of bananas! - 518 pounds for secondary packing to
maintain or adjust blasts, 20 pounds to feed midgets
a body bag full of jello, - auto control device, duct taped to
the stacks, the jiggling absorbs the vibration of the blasts to
maintain accuracy, 2 rolls of duct tape to attatch device.
three midgets, - 1 to operate stacks, 1 to lubricate stacks, 1 to
supervise, 1 roll of tape to secure them to the tanker.
6 rolls of duct tape,
an electric generator - taped to tanker, 3 rolls of tape to
attatch
gz's Kinder gentler plan to wreak global havoc:
round up all the cyclists, joggers, power walkers and marathon
runners in all the countries on earth and have them co-ordinated
and sychronized to do their thing in the same direction at the
same time. If you want to increase earth's spin, have them move
west, and to decrease the earth's spin, move east. Either way,
watch the fun!!! Pollution free Apocalypse!! >}-)
Doctor Death !-[ and his Evil Midgets
You Again!!!
Sun Jul 29 06:02:20 2001
(oh well take that)
Darn you Agent Greyzone (shaking fist in the air) You've foiled
my plans once again! But you think your so smart?!? Now I'm going
to have to resort to plan 'D'! muahahahaha and for that I'll be
using:
66,070,432 rolls of aluminum
foil (Reynolds extra heavy duty not that bargain brand)
18 tubes 0f KY-Jelly
18 Kegs of beer (empty)
1,250,000 rubber bands (not little green ones but those big red
ones that really sting when they hit you over and over and over
and their laughing at....oh... ackm, yes where was I?) oh yes!
then I will need:
19 midgets (you must always use midgets when you are attempting
to destroy the world. it's a union thing.)
18 custom made extra-small spacesuits
18 pairs of very strong oven mits
63 cans of sardines
49 boxes of crackers
and of coarse
473,096 rolls of duck tape (duck tape is always a must)
and this time theres nothing you can do to stop me!
Nothing I say !-| cause now that you've seen my face I have to
kill you.......
greyzone
Secret Intelligence
Sun Jul 29 23:24:50 2001
DARK!!....WATCH OUT BEHIND YOU---DUCK QUICK!!
gz *Quickly disappears to seek out his 'source' Dark Green, the
evil younger brother of Red Green*
thedemonsmonkey
:-)
Mon Jul 30 02:52:09 2001
Hey Grey, ya shouldn't give out yer 'secret sources' like that...ya
never know who might be listening! ;-)
Doctor Death !-[ and his Evil midgets
muahahahahaha
Mon Jul 30 05:26:08 2001
muahahahaha hee hee hee... Looking for greyzone? Well I have him
strapped to my laser casterator! He'll be singing falsetto any
minute now !-] And you and an army of spatula wielding Squirrels
cant stop me! muahahahaha
thedarkone
fire up the laser powered casterator
Posted 7-30-2001 06:36
AHA, I have you stumped now, dont I? Well now that I have you
strapped into my laser powered
casterator have you any last words?? aye speak up there...
greyzone
Lazer Razer
Tue Jul 31 01:12:38 2001
Grey comes to and finds himself chained to an old rusty gurney in
the dreaded Schloss Hambergermitdeworks. The stench of the mold
and slime mingles with the acrid smell of heated old bakelite.
Moving slowly upwards from the foot of the gurney is the most
secret and diabolical invention of his arch rival, Doktor Death!!
It defies description so I won't bore you with the details, but
needless to say it is the kreation of the universe's most
feindish plotters.
All about are the cruel doctor's biotechno mutant midgets,
dressed in shabby labcoats whacking each other on the heads with
their clipboards and the meaner ones are stabbing some of the
others with their pencils. But where is the doktor?? I creened my
neck to look behind me as best as I could and could only just
make out a dark figure cooing and caressing IBM's state of the
art, qaud pentium iv with a nuclear Gates board-up-the-windows
software!
I notice the door silently opening and it's my SALVATION, The
Demon's Monkey!!! She catches the attention of the midgets who
start hopping about like rabid insane leprechauns wishing they
were monkeys too. She escapes the detection of the doktor who is
desensitized to the antics of his union lackeys and moves to my
side and passes, unseen, a cool stainless steel dental mirror.
Slipping out again, she made her apologies if she had disturbed
anything.
I was starting to feel a prickly heat and the smell of burning
cloth, and realized, to my horror, the device was about to
perform it's hideous task on it's intended target!! I felt the
cool steel in my hand and brought the mirror and positioned it
under the laser reflecting it's beam to the chains on my ankles
cutting them like a hot blade through butter. I then freed my
wrists, following the beam as it moved up along my body. I then
located the feedback interface between device and computer and
gave it a awesome zap!
Por ole Doktor.... hehe,eh?
gz *thanks Monkey, I owes ya big*
Doctor Death !-[ and his Evil Midgets
meanwhile...
Tue Jul 31 06:42:02 2001
Well now that I have Agent Greyzone chained up I can finally get
back to my beloved! If those damn midgets would just quiet down I
could finalize my plans to black out the sun by using the 18 now
empty *hic* kegs of beer to launch the well lubed up (it aint
easy squeezing midgets in spacesuits into a keg a brew)
midgets into space. The only thing stopping me now is how to
string together
1,250,000 rubber bands without snapping myself with them! (I hate
it when that happens!) But once I have that figured out I can use
the rubberbands to slingshot the midget and foil filled kegs into
space so that my evil midgets can use the extra heavy foil to
wrap the sun up with (shinny side in so as to reflect the rays,
haha i'm always thinking) then all they have to do is wrap it all
up in duct tape and the world will be plunged into total darkness!!!
And since those foolish midgets dont have a way back to earth all
the sardines and crackers will be mine do you hear! Mine I say!
Mmuaahahahahaha* eh wha the...MY BELOVED! Oh the humanity! Who
could have done this?!?
GREYZONE! I should have known! but how?!?
* ~` MIDGES IN SPACE ~`*
greyzone
Midges In Space
Posted 8-3-2001 03:28
|-& Psssstt! My name is Kwazi Mojo. Many mistake me for a
camel but if I'm in a good mood they never live to regret it.
ugha ugha schlaghh... hic, oops. I couldn't help but hear you
cursin bout them midges. Say, hand me one of them lastic bands,
that is if you have any hands left, and keep an eye on that midge
over there. Can't see it?? Then squint with your good eye. |-[
Twaaang........splat. Sh*t! Missed. Sorry about your sardine. |-{
Well anyway maybe you could use a hand or two |-} to package
those dwarves over there. I have a revolutionary gizmo that fits
anything into anything, but it is so secret you'll have to shut
your eye while it makes a few adjustments to your duct tape.
Sound good to you Dok?
KM per(gz) *shhh, don't let on*
THEDARKONE
!-]
Posted 8-3-2001 08:54
Fits everything into anything!!! That's just what I need!!!
People don't appreciate what us evil geniuses go through. They
don't care about the long hours of midget stuffing I have to do
just to try and take over (i.e. destroy) the world!!! Do you KNOW
what its like smeering KY all over a hairy little midget!!! It's
not pleasent I'll tell ya that! But it's nice to find someone
that understands what
we madmen gotta go through. So if I close my eyes you'll give me
the Everything-Anything Stuffer?
Well ok then here I go |-|.....Ok GIVE it to me.
greyzone
The Sting
Posted 8-4-2001 04:50
OK! Make sure there shut real tight. Ready? 1...2...3...
rip...snip, rip...snip. Now just to ensure your safety and well
being, I'm just going to put these protective coverings on your
eyes...there. That didn't hurt now. OK now.
RRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP....slap! Shhoowooosh..zwwwIiir,
zwwwIIiiir.....BRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAKKKK......slap! Shhoowooosh..zwwwIiir,
zwwwIIiiir.......SNIP!
Ha! Gotcha. You cannot escape the clammy trap of the 'Fog'!! It's
an old trick that Red Green innocently passed down to his young
nephew, Dark, when no one suspected the growing darkness...
TheDarkOne
Trapped!!
Posted 8-10-2001 08:44
Trapped!! thats what I get for trusting a camel!! Lucky for me he
didn't realize that I always carry
my handy mad scientist addition swiss army knife made for just
this sort of perdicaments! If I..could...just..reach it...ah ha
got it!
Now all I have to do is pull out that useless little pair of
tweezers that I modified into an antenna...uh...grrr...common
dammit.... there now all I have to do is press the concelled
button that will send the signal to my loyal minions. they will
fall on this place with a vengence like only crazed midgets can!
But while I'm waiting I'll see if I can distract that damn camel
with some of my cunning and oh so witty banter...."Hey your
fly unzipped!!" ha that gets them everytime.....
greyzone
Bear Droppings, Zippers & Things
Posted 8-11-2001 04:02
-NB. The first part was added from another thread.
My Dear Herr Doktor. You are looking very well, in fact I've
never seen you look better. Must be because you missed me. You
miss your midges too?? Well I last saw them hovering over some
bear droppings. So the question is, 'Does a wild bear sh*t in the
woods?' Well in this case no, it was down by the shore. hahaha..hehe..ho!
Pardon me I'm still a little giddy...
~~~~~~~~~~~~
gz having returned from dispatching Dr. Death's midges to an
irresistable delight, wild bear being so rare in these parts,
feels it's time to throw off his fleabitten camel disguise and
reveal his loyal true blue and orange identity. Well on a
accounta the costume being so fleabitten, the zipper got stuck
and no amount of cursing would unstick it. "%&#)~!&(^ing
thing!!" From behind him Doktor Death is struggling in his
duct tape suit, and distracts gz with 'it gets the guy every
time', "Hey your fly is unzipped!!", not that he can do
very much about it being stuck an all.
But gz begins to suspect that he has reason to be a little
concerned as he can see that Herr Doktor is mumbling into a
metallic toothpick!? Maybe it's not as bad as all that and he's
only cleaning some midges from between his teeth. Just the same,
if only he could get this damn camel off his back!
Where is the Monkey when you need her??...
DOCTORDEATH
callin in the reserves
Posted 8-13-2001 07:08
That swine thinks I'm finished but little does he know that I
have a elite squad of ninja midgets,
that I keep in reserve for just such perdicaments. *crack..squak*
"come in herr Doctor this is
Sven are you there doc?"... "Quiet down you fool I'm
here. Have you brought the others?"
*crack..squak* "yes were all here I brought phil, josh,
biff, buffy, and of coarse myself and my son sven svensons, and
his boy sven svenssonson" Great great wonderful now shut up
and..*crack..squak* "and together we are the ninja midgets
in space!" yes yes you nincompoop now get in here and save...
*crack..squak* "Biff, Buffy stop messin around I think the
boss needs us"
Oh my head! It's so hard to find good help these days! alright
you guys... *crack..squak* "yes boss, what ya need boss,
you'd like I'd get ya some nice sardines and crackers?" NO
YOU fOOL GET ME OUTTA HERE!!!
*crack..squak* "ahhh sure boss right away. but...how do we
get in this thing???"
aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaauuuuggggghhhhh.....
DOCTORDEATH
|-]
Posted 8-14-2001 13:05
MMuuaahhaHAHAHaha
Swine release me at once!!!
greyzone
The Prone Stranger & Pronto
Posted 8-15-2001 05:18
In the distance a lone rider can be seen approaching in a cloud
of dust blowing the opening movement of 'The William Tell
Overture" on his bugle.
Bdlat, bdlat, bdlat dat dat dat dat dat....Hi Ho Pronto, awayyyyy.......
Whoa old boy your gonna wear out yor hump if ya don't ease up! I
don't know what yer gettin so riled up about? That fleabitten old
camel yonder is more like a sight for no eyes, not sore eyes.
What's gotten into yer oats, eh? Am I gonna have to get the
saltpetre out again? OK, it might be actin a little strange,
wrigglin about and such but.....hmmmmm, I'm beginning to see what
you mean. The beast is trying to strip!! It has already attracted
an audience, one strange mummy pickin it's teeth, gettin all
excited. Better put the blinkers on you, trusty mount!
Do you hear that Pronto? It's a sound like I've never heard.
Listen...'sssVEeeennnn...SVVveeeennn..sVenn, sVenn... Ouch! This
is not a cloud of dust behind us, it's a plague of ninja midges!
We gotta outrun this mass of swarming midges! They will tear us
apart with their razor-like mandibles and drive us insane with
their incessant svenning.
I have a plan! Quick, lets hightail it over to that ex-exotic
camel, but for God's sake just keep movin or I'll see that you
are the first meal!
The Prone Ranger and Pronto, rushed by the struggling greyzone
and passed the silver mummy picking it's teeth, marvelling at
what strange and bizarre antics that go on in the desert. They
dodged behind a rock further down the trail to indulge a morbid
curiosity for the spectacle that was to follow. They watched the
hellish horde descend swiftly and mercilessly upon the helpless
old camel, stripping the skin off it's carcass. For some reason,
they left their feast unfinished and ponderously moved toward the
strange mummy only to swirll about it in a frenzied type of
extacsy, allowing what seemed to be the shape of a man run off
unoticed!
Greyzone can't beieve his luck having escaped the clutches of a
most viscious death, and he said out loud, "Who was that
masked man anyway??"
DMonkey
Batman??
Posted 8-15-2001 10:49
...Uh, that was just a guess!lol ;-) DM
greyzone
I'm Confused
Posted 8-17-2001 02:47
Hy Monkey!
Batman doesn't start with "bldat....." if you remember
it begins with, "duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh..."and
so on. Also not to confuse his transport which has black wings
and not a hump with 4 legs.
Or did you mean Fatman in the Adventures of Robin Z. Hood?
DOCTORDEATH
outta here
Posted 8-17-2001 07:32
Sven you finally made it you fool! Hurry now while that swine is
distracted by that stunningly attractive monkey, we'll slip away
back into the darkness to plot our revenge! Quickly now get me
out of this mess! "Sure boss here let me help"
aaagguurrraaa stop pulling on my head you idiot that's not
helping one bit! "I'm sorry boss lets try this" swooosh
sssssss ahh not a flamethrower! Are you trying to kill me?!?! You...you...nincompoop!
Never mind freeing me just get me outta here and then, well get
me out of this confounded trap...... wha... not my feet you fool
OWW watch the head! What's that boss? No time now gotta get going
I think they seen us.......THUMP OWW.......THUMP OWW
......THUNK OHHH my achin head!
greyzone
The Three Great Escapes
Posted 10-8-2001 04:48
The Prone Ranger and Pronto saw
that it was all clear to come out. For some odd reason the hordes
of midges were actually hauling off the bedraggled mummy by it's
feet! Oh the horror!! I just don't want to imagine what fate is
waiting upon the poor wretch. The shredded camel was now only a
speck on the horizon and The Prone Ranger asked his trusty
sidekick, Pronto, " What was that thing anyway??"
Pronto replied, "Kemo Sabe.... if you didn't wear that silly
mask all the time you would have noticed the buttocks of a
whiteman, not unlike yourself". Pronto smiled inwardly to
himself, sometimes they can be so amusing when they're not being
so dumb.
"Well Pronto, let us ride off into the western sunset
together and let them wonder and marvel who we are." The
once proud ranger said as he readjusted his mask and eager to get
out of there before some other weird thing came along.
Greyzone too was still in a state of awesome bewilderment as he
struggled towards that patch of shimmering water in the distance.
"What if it's just a mirage?" he thought to himself. On
and on he zig zagged. Not even a cactus to be seen. They say that
lots of grubs are good for you. "Can't see nothin but
scorpions and snakes."
But wait.......what's that I smell??!? In his delerious state he
was sure he could smell 'Lobster Thermidore'! No!...... it's more
like Curried Bombay Chicken on a bed of brown rice......" He
was saying these things to himself as he followed his nose,
doglike, to the edge of a gulley where, looking over the edge, to
his utter amazement, was an encampment of Gypsys quietly enjoyng
Hungarian Goulash!! Was this a mirage of mirages?...........
greyzone
Out of the frying pan......
Posted 11-8-2001 05:29
Real or unreal, Greyzone
couldn't contain himself any longer and in his weakness, rolled
himself down the side of the gully and wound up smack dab in the
middle of the camp! The startled Gypsys dropped their plates and
ducked under their wagons thinking that they were being attacked
by indians! When they saw it was only a poor excuse for a man,
half dressed like a camel, they all rushed in to get a closer
view. The women, especially the older ones, were starting to feel
all motherly, or something, towards this poor half naked wretch
of a thing and scolded the menfolk that they should help him up
and dust him off and to get him a blanket and some clothes.
The headman went over to Greyzone who only had the strength to
gasp "I am hungry.... " to which the headman proudly
replied with a great beaming smile, "I am American! Speak
good ingles, been in country long distance!" To which
Greyzone collapsed totally confused.
The women, after boxing all the men's ears, rushed over and
hefted him up bodily and carried him over to the place closest to
the great steaming pot of goulash and asked Greyzone in broken
english, "Hungry?"
Greyzone shook his head feebly and said "No, me from up
north, land of eskimos...." his voice trailing off. The
women stared at him quisicaly, then at each other, saying, "He
crazy, no time for talk, fill his stomach!"
When gz came to the next day, or who knows, it might have been
the next week, he found himself being comfortably bumped about in
a wooden wagon, not like the conestoga kind but some kinda
foreign model, you could say a fancy import! There was lots of
leg room, in fact it was more like the equivalent of an
'Airstream' motor home. Rugs and covered pillows on the floor,
woven tapestries on the walls, strange but intricately worked
bronze lamps swinging from the ceiling and mounts on the walls.
There was also an exotic smell of leather, wool and incense in
everything. On the wooden shelves lining the walls were all sorts
a bottles and jars of all sizes and shapes and in the corner at
the front was an old wooden chest covered with with carvings of
very strange people and animals in a mountain setting. The bronze
strapping was worked in various curved and angled shapes that
could have been some form of unknown writing. And for such a
valuable chest there was no lock!?! The temptation was almost
overwhelming, my curiosity was almost too much to bear, but with
the utmost control, I resisted!!
I stuck my head out the window and to my amazement we were in the
mountains! But which mountains?!? I mean they all can look the
same, like the one's carved on the chest......!
At that point, the headman's woman popped her head around from
the driver's side of the wagon and gave me a big toothless smile.
Something vaguely hideous about it which I didn't notice before,
I mean how could I? I was out-to-lunch, like off-the-wall the
last I could recall. It's almost a sense that even Herr Doktor
Death and the whole Svenson Clan would be preferable!!
DOCTORDEATH
of alias and enemys...
Posted 11-8-2001 09:58
THUMP OWW.......THUMP OWW!
They dragged the entangled Doktor for what seemed like miles
through the burning desert sun thumping and bumping his head all
the way...until finaly, STOP! STOP YOU VOOLS!!!
Ahh you idiots why do I put up with you?
Now what are we gonna do? The Doktor surveyed the landscape there
was alot to see...alot of sand that is, except toward the eastern
horizon he could see what looked to be a small range of hills, it
seemed like his best bet so he gathered the Svenson clan (which
is no easy task) and set off toward the east.
The sun beat down on his exausted form, the vultures were
starting to circle overhead, Dokter Death could almost see the
vultures drooling in anticapation of thier next meal. But onward
they went, half dragging themselves, half crawling toward what
was thier only hope for living, to see that swine
Greyzone, pay dearly for what he had done to bring about this
dire circumstance that he now found himself in!
Just as the sun began to set they reached the foot of the hills.
Now finally they could stop to rest. He found the most
comfortable spot he could, which was little more then a curved
rock and a pile of twigs and brush, but after all that he had
been through it was like a heavenly bed of soft fluffy clouds.
And within moments he was sleeping soundly blissfully unaware
that they were being watched! Fearsome eyes peered out through
the underbrush, from the few trees, from everywhere! They watched
them for many hours, wondering who are these strange looking
people? What do they want?
(((How happy he was joyfully torturing Greyzone! How he loved to
watch him beg for mercy. It was a wonderfully dark and rain day,
the Doktor could feel the cold breeze blow in through the window
of his secret hide out. He loved this time of year and the
combination of Greyzone's tortured screams and the cold chills
running down his back was so wonderful that he could hardly stand
it! But when he turned and walked back over to his captive,
suddenly he realized that it wasnt that meddling agent that was
straped to the table, no it was the doktor himself that was being
tortured and Greyzone was
standing over him poking him with a stick! no this cant be! He
was so close... so close... so)))
He awoke with a start he blurried eyes slowly focused in on the
figure stand in front of him prodding him with his staff. Slowly
the realization that it had all been a dream and he was still
stuck in the middle of the desert and to top it off they were now
surrounded by a native people. It only took him
a moment to realize that this must have been the legendary lost
Indian tribe that were rumored to roam this desert that they
called home. Now it was clear that they were no mere legend, no
they were all to real and they didnt look to happy! He could see
in the early morning light that the idiot Svensons were mostly
still asleep unaware that they were probably moments from their
doom!
He carefully got to his feet making sure not to make any
threatening move that might invoke a hostile response from their
captures. All around he could hear them talking in hushed
whispers to each other but the words made no sense. Thankfully a
tall native stepped forward and started to speak to them in a
broken form of English, "how you come here?" and "
what want you with us?" "Gypsys your not! So where come
you from?
The Doktor told him the truth and explained how he was a hero for
all that is good and just and that he was after an evil renegade
outlaw know only as Greyzone!!! After hearing this the tall man
that turned out to be the medicine man of the tribe he told the
chief and his people all about the Doktor's fight against the
evil Greyzone. The chief was so moved he vowed to help find and
destroy this devil of a man! And as luck would have it his scouts
had reported seeing a strange man half dressed
like a camel stumbling in to the camp of thier most hated enemies..."The
Gypsies"!!!
~ Midges In
Space ~
(Part 2)
greyzone
Of too much wine & too much song
Posted 11-17-2001 05:36
The sun was nearly
down and being that the caravan was heading into it, they were
obviously headed west. Dark clouds were gathering and pouring
down from out of the mountain passes. Flashs of lightning could
be seen around the peaks. The old Gypsy woman looked around again
and somehow I knew we would be making camp for the night. I think
it was my empty stomach that was letting me know and not some
telepathic communication.
The evening meal was yet another meal of goulash, but the only
thing that made it tolerable was this strangely delightful,
little hungarian, fortified red wine to which there seemed no
shortage of. It does funny things to the head though, but I'm
sure that it was because of my exhausting ordeal, keeping the
Earth a safe & secure place, where little one's would not be
troubled in their dreams by the Herr Doktor Death and the evil
Svenson Clan hiding under their beds every night.
These Gypsies are an uncanny lot, maybe it's the violin music
too, and not just the wine, that that draws the mind off into
strange and faraway places. Places somewhat familiar, something
that I have recently just seen. The music is filling my head and
starting to dance with the wine (if you can imagine that). The
dancing shapes are beginning to take on the form animals with
human heads and conversely, humans with animal and bird's heads.
One in particular was becoming the most apparent. The body was
that of a lion, stretched out on it's stomach with it's paws
extended in front of it. The head was most likely that of a male
but you couldn't be altogether too sure as the head covering it
was wearing could be that of a scarf often worn by women, or
maybe it was.....oh forget it, the possibilities are endless.
But the images I was getting was clear to me now. It was those
from the mysterious chest and these were not mountains but they
were pyramids! I get it!! I get it. The Gypsies must have been
the original Egyptians that were driven from their homelands by
the First Dynasty Pharaohs and doomed to wander endlessly seeking
a new homeland, over 5000 years ago!! But that's another story.
Among the many stories they told me over the campfire, and not to
mention a few whopper fish stories, they were telling me of the
their original mortal enemies, The Indians, their traditional
arch rivals, who, like themselves, came from a distant star
system and had colonies on Earth, one on one side of the ocean
and one on the other, and as long as things stayed that way there
was peace.
Well it was during the period of the last ice age that the
colonists from across the water were able to walk accross to the
other side because the sea levels were so low and, like the
distant ancestors of the Gypsies, they were bumped from their
homeland too, forced to seek out a new homeland for themselves.
In hushed voices they tell me that it is rumoured that they are,
like themselves seeking out the last uninhabitable place on Earth...right
here!!
TheDarkOne
the next day
Posted 1-19-2002 10:21
Later that night
after much food and drink, I slept the sleep of the dead, the
night seemed to last for 'months' visions of pyramids and
starships swirled throught my head. The feeling of great loss and
great suffering filled my sleep with dread.
I awoke late the following day to the sound of screaming, deep
voices shouting out orders over
the den of wailing women and crying children. Two thoughts passed
through my throbbing head,
what could possibly cause all this? And where the hell were my
pants?!?!
It didnt take long for me to find out... what was going on that
is, my pants, I had no idea so I grabbed a deerskin from the
floor and wrapped it around my waist and not a moment
to soon for seconds later the flap to the hut I was using flew
open and what must have been the
entire tribal council came rushing in all talking at the same
time. Since I could hardly understand
one at a time it was impossible to make out what they were saying
all shouting and gesturing in unison. My pounding head could
stand no more so I cried out HAS ANYONE SEEN MY PANTS?!?! Well
that seemed to do the trick the hut fell silent all around me
they stared gape mouthed not sure what to say. The chief quickly
broke the silence. Stepping forward he calmly told me that the
Gypsies were spotted near the foothills heading our way!
He feared that they were coming to attack them and at the worst
possible time, a large group of
their best hunters were far from thier camp leaving mostly the
tribe elders and the woman
and children to fight off thier entire tribe! What could they
possibly do? Thier advanced scouts were only a few stone throws
away from the edge of thier encampment! Again the group started
talking all at once but the old chief, who was still a large and
formidable man, raised his arms and they fell silent.
He looked me in the eye and said coldly 'you're our only hope'.
Me?! what could I do? I dont even have my pants for christsake! I
asked him what I could do to help? And he explained to me that if
I could rally the Sven clan to thier defence that we could become
part of thier tribe.
Oh they were in for a surprise if all our hopes are pinned on the
Svens then I'm leaving now cause
we are S.O.L!
The chief and the rest of them just stared blankly at me. I
couldnt tell if they knew what I was trying
to say until the chief's head dropped down and he slowly turned
around and headed for the flap of
my hut. I knew what I had to do I had to get the boys together
and get the hell out of there! Sure
I lived to see the head of that swine on a stick but not if it
ment having a whole clan of Gypsies putting a curse on my ass! No
I knew
exactly what I had to do....unfortunately that wasn't what I did.
Before I knew what I was doing I heard myself say, "wait up
there chief I'll help you out. We'll fight
our way out of this mess!" I only wish I was as confident as
I sounded.
With this the chief spun around and grabbed me up in a big bear
hug, laughing and patting me on the
back. After a few minutes of this he finally set me down saying.
"YES, yes my strange friend! I knew you were a good man! If
you defeat them you will have a place on the council."
Yeah, yeah first things first. I still have to get the boys ready
and thats no mean feat. I stepped outside and I could see by the
darking of the sky and the flashes of lighting that we were in
for a hell of a storm. The chief stepped out behind me and I told
him that I thought we were in luck there's no way they would be
planning to attack in this storm so I think we may have bought
ourselves some time.
Time was just what we needed and lots of it! How could I have
gotten in to this mess? I'm
nobody's hero! All I wanted was a place to lay low and regain my
strenght so that I might once again find a way to take over the
world and play with the entrails of that swine Greyzone!
I called out to my men and we gathered in my hut to plan for the
nexts days raid, after hours
of explaining and re-explaining what was going on I came to the
conclusion that our only hope was
for the hunting party to return in time to save our sorry hides!
greyzone
It was a dark and stormy night...
Posted 1-24-2002 04:51
The sky in the
foothills was decidedly peculiar. It was turning colours like
those sickly bruises; greenish yellow, black and blue. It was
most ominous. The Gypsies themselves appeared unsure at the sight
of this foreboding sky. Besides, they were getting hungry and
their scouts had not returned yet with news, or more importantly
food! The women were getting restless to fire up BBQ cause
tonight there was supposed to be a special ceremony and shish
kabob was on the menu. Shortly it would be dark and the appointed
time for the event could not be delayed! There was a hasty
meeting of the elders and it was decided that the fires would be
lit and there would have to be a search party for the missing
scouts. Little to know that I was it, as I was blissfully
sleeping.
(((How happy he was joyfully torturing Doktor Death! How he loved
to watch him beg for mercy; it was a wonderfully dark and rainy
day. Greyzone could feel the cold breeze blow in through the
window of his secret hide out. He loved this time of year and the
combination of Dok Death's tortured screams and the cold chills
running down his back was so wonderful that he could hardly stand
it! But when he turned and walk back over to his captive suddenly
he realized that it wasn't that meddling agent that was strapped
to the table, no it was Greyzone himself that was being tortured
and Doktor Death was standing over him poking him with a stick!
No this cant be! He was so close... so close... so))) (something
definitely familiar here)
I awoke with a start to see the woman elder with a hideous 'mona
lisa' smile, poking me in the belly button with her arthritic
middle finger, it's no wonder she has a hideous smile. "Time
for din dins?" I asked, masking my thought of yet another
plate of goulash, with an enthusiastic, yet stupid, grin.
Like two dark crystal balls, I could see deep into her dilated
pupils at this close range. A curious swirling, wispy fog started
to move, swaying cobra-like in her eyes, that began to seep into
my eyes and into my mind. I was fixated. Kaleidoscopic patterns
began to form, slowly reforming into more recognizeable shapes. I
found I was floating above the encampment able to see several
miles clearly in all directions. I could make out 3 figures
approaching the encampment and were highly recognizeable as being
the 3 Gypsy scouts, in floppy pedal pushers, knee-high boots and
the classic sheepskin vests! Two of them had various small
amimals tied together and hanging from their shoulders, hares,
prairie dogs, a gila monster, some kangaroo mice and one
diamondback rattler! The last fellow was toting a bag with roots,
berries and nuts, and some tumbleweed thinking it was the herb
called sage brush.
From the other direction, I saw 8 different figures much further
off but obviously headed towards the camp. And off to their left
was that crazy dude in the white hat and the mask on that smart-ass
horse. It seems to me that we were all just wandering in circles
of varying radii, gradually, as fate would have it, converging at
the same point at the same time! I mean what are the
possibilities!! What does this mean?
Turning back to the scouts, in the distance a fire caught my
attention! I found my body moving swiftly yet silently towards it.
There were a number of figures dancing around the fire. Now who
would be dancing around a fire at this time of day, they should
be eating?! They weren't prospectors trying to stay warm, they
would be passed out drunk or playing cards by now. So it could
only be Indians!! Upon closer observation, there was a small
group of figures not at all like the Indians who were headbangin
and moshin and stuff and one figure in particular who was waving
his hands about wildly and jumping up and down. I thought I could
hear him above the racket shouting, "No, no, no you
nincompoops!"
I was struck by something vaguely familiar about him. My mind was
doing funny tricks on me in this state, at that instant a whole
lifetime flashed in front of my eyes! An alien scene of gold
skies and black sun, a motherlike figure bending over me. I was
in a cradle of some strange design and material. As she lifted
me, I was aware of this awkward appendage on my left side. I
looked over and to my shock I was joined at the hip with another
being that was looking straight back at me with undisguised
impatience as if I was a nincompoop!
A NINCOMPOOP!?!
That was the key that brought back a flood of memories of joy and
pain and something that was hidden from me up til now. I WASN'T
AN ONLY CHILD!! "My bro, my bro! We never knew! Or, did you?"
There were rumours I heard when I was young but I didn't feel any
reason why I should care. On planet aiaG, 'canerican twins' were
common, but in our case the delivery was very long, one head came
out first when the black sun was up, that must have been HIM! The
next head was mine when the grey moon was high in the black night
sky. As the ritual was observed, after the seventh day at
midnight, circumcision divided us in two. The rumour continues
that one of us was abducted by Svenson midgets and held for
ransome, but as our noble family had fallen on hard times, the
demands, unfortunately, could not be met. Our fortunes had laid
out a long and interesting road for us and now I understand!! I
rememeber him being named THEDARKONE on account of his birth
under the black sun, and I was named Greyzone on account of few
people had the foggiest idea where I was coming from...... hmmmmm.
I would prefer to think it was because the grey moon looked on my
birth.
As fate would have it, we were wanderers and were asked to go
colonize a planet or something. So we joined the merchant ships
and went to seek our fortunes completely unaware that we were on
the same ship, after all, we didn't know of each other's
existence! But now that I think of it, the ship's 'bones' was
quite extraordinary. He had a wonderful way aneathesizing
patients, something he did with his 'beloved' for which he was
famous for, but I don't exactly remember what it was as I never
had the pleasure of his ministrations. I was much removed from
him, being the captain's editor of the ship's log, analyst and
partime history teacher. I love stories!!
I was brought back to the present by a glint of a small metallic
thing below me several stones throw away from Doktor Death's....
YES! That was his name! Doktor Death! It had caught the sun's
last ray. I descended unseen to retrieve it, and surprised to
find it was Dok Death's metallic toothpick, but in fact it was a
small swiss multi-function communicating device! It was truly a
marvel, a combo 2 way radio, fax, scanner, copier and printer,
unfortunately it lacked email and web browsing capabilities! But
nevertheless, as luck would have it 'finders keepers, losers
weepers', HA!
It was time to get back to the camp before I was late for chow
not to mention stirring their suspicious attitude about
strangers, like me, and I had been away a long time. They were
already lined up for second helpings by the time I crashed back
into my body and wandered dazedly to the food line. I received a
swift look from the from the old wit...er I mean elder who
returned to her sanctifying the plates as they were served. Now
this was something out-of-the-ordinary! Shish ka Bab and a side
of some kind of gravy! My mouth was watering for the first time
in ages and my poor starved taste buds were screaming!
I was just about to be served when the scouts raised the alarm!
Everyone, once again ducked under the caravans, waiting to see
where the Indian attack would come from. I was left standing
there empty plate in hand, still stunned from my out-of-body
experience. If this was to be my final moment I wasn't going to
go down hungry, not again, not never! I shoveled my plate into
the pot and before I could wolf it down this voice behind me
called softly, "BOOO!! Muahahaha.....Aaaarrghhhhhahack.....hic!
scuse."
"KWAZI!!! Is that really you Kwazi!"
"HA! Yes, it is I, Kwazi Mojo, seventh son of the seventh
son, at your service mon ami! I have with me all my son's, here's
Semi, my first son who you know, then there's, Snazi, and Sleezi,
and Sneezi, then Dozi, and Kozi, and last but not least, my
seventh son, which makes him the seventh son of the seventh son
of the seventh son, Krazi!! Say hi to uncle Grey boys!"
"Hic...hic...hic...hic...hic...hic...burp!"
"Chips off the old block I see Kwazi!" I said, "You
guys hungry?? Dig in!"
So all the Mojos helped themselves and finished off the pot!
"Great ke babs Grey, any more?"
"Oh! Now that you mention it, the Gypsies are going to be
mighty pissed at me for eating it all up. This was supposed to be
for some kind of ceremony or something."
"Umm....don't look behind you Grey but there is a very nasty
looking old babe coming at you. I'd be careful what you say to
her. Any one who looks like my own mother is a danger to society
let alone to any one body."
Before she could grab me by the ear, once again there was a great
commotion coming towards the camp and she froze. I can't imagine
why, someone as truly fearsome as she. A bugle bleated into the
dark evening...bldat, bldat, bldat dat dat.... and so on. Could
it be Gorgeous George Custer and the Seventh Cavalry?!? (sheesh,
what's with all the sevenths is this rock n roll?) Not that he
was particularly wanted here, but that was soon ruled out when
they could make out a voice pleading "Hey Whoa Pronto, no
way!!!"
Crashing into the encampment this time was the Prone Stranger
with his mask blinding him completely and Pronto rising high on
his hind legs and kicking up such a fuss! Perhaps it was the
sight of the pissed off old crone and her wild eyes! But nope
that wasn't it either as they were both staring at the figure
licking up the last morsel in the pot who had just popped his
head out to see what the fuss was all about! It was Krazi Mojo,
if you recall was the seventh to the power of three, son!! (this
seventh business is too uncanny, I think it's time to buy a lotto)
Well that was too much for the chieftess, she quickly gave orders
to break camp, dark or no dark, storm or no storm, this
definitely was not the place and time for the 'Convergence
Ceremony', they would have to wait until all the signs were
propitious again. The beasts were madly harnessed to the wagons,
while others were gathering up what possessions were neccessary,
and wildly bumped and crashed off into the night!
It so happened, as fate would have it, the wheel of the
chieftess' luxury wagon hit a log, lifting half the wagon into
the air, and when it came down with crash, the door popped open
and out flew the mysterious box, unnoticed by the Gypsies, but
certainly noticed by Greyzone!
Now it was their turn to watch in stunned amazement at the
departure of the Gypsies. All except the Prone Ranger, as he was
lying some where prone in the bushes having been thrown by Pronto
who was now having a philosophical discussion with Krazi about
the meaning of all this and life in general.
My curiosity was now absolutely out of control considering the
circumstances that put this wonderful chest in my hands. So we
all went to fetch the chest and bring it back to the fire where
we would have enough light to see it's contents. To our surprise
and dissappointment, we could not budge it, but as Krazi and
Pronto were there, we harnessed the box to Pronto and rolled it
on logs back to the fire where we studied upon it with great
respect. There was no lock that could be be seen anywhere! Not
even Kwazi who was wise in the old lore and scripts could find
the lock.
We were completely caught unawares of the storm that finally
broke with apocalyptic vengeance; terrifying winds, thunder and
lightning and raining monkeys and squirrels! Suddenly amidst the
chaos, all was very quiet, though you could see the storm raging
all around, we were in the EYE! And in that EYE there was a shaft
of light that shone directly on the alien box and a deep voice
filled the whole of the EYE saying, "Whosoever solves the
riddle of the chest shall be the Rightful Dude." Then the
storm broke on our heads once again throwing everything into
darkness. We would have to wait for light to begin to solve the
riddle.
"Skwak....Crack Who's the...Skwak...Crack Whas a matta wi...Skwak...Krack...Must
be the storm....Damn thing's soaked..."
"AAAaacckk!!" I nearly jumped out of my booties! "Voices
coming out of my pocket!! Am I nuts? Oh, hey! that's Dok's radio
I picked up! Whew, I thought I'd need a shrink." Hmmmmm, a
funny thought occurred to me, he must be up to somethin with
those Indians. They too were having some kind of ceremony tonight.
How coincidental that the Gypsies and the Indians were both
having ceremonies tonight. What could that possibly mean? Soooooo
many mysteries! I think this calls for a meeting!
We all gathered together and tried to listen and be heard above
the racket, and even though analysis was my prized skill, none
could understand what I was driving at and for that matter
neither could I. Perhaps a clue could be found in the designs on
the box, but by then it could be too late! Just a hunch, call it
intuition (but don't tell anybody cause analysts aren't supposed
to be intuitive).
Krazi Mojo must have been reading my mind and as he was skilled
in the higher arts as well as the lower arts, he had studied
ancient braile. So in the darkess he ran his fingers and toes in
and along all the grooves and ridges for what seemed an eternity.
His eyes suddenly dissappeared into the back of his head, his
bushy hair went spiked, he shuddered, and from his bowels a
hideous voice warned us that, "ALL WAS AT STAKE! ALL COULD
BE LOST! TWO FORCES WERE CONVERGING FOR THE FINAL CONFLICT! THE
TWO FORCES HAVE MANIFESTED THEMSELVES AS BEINGS OF THIS PLANET.
5000 YEARS WILL BRING THEM TOGETHER TO USHER IN OBLIVION OF NOT
JUST THIS PLANET BUT OF ALL TIME AND SPACE! THEY CAN BE
RECOGNIZED AS A TRIBE OF GYPSIES AND A TRIBE OF INDIANS! IF YOU
CARE FOR ANYTHING AT ALL YOU MUST SOLVE THE RIDDLE OF THE CHEST!"
So there you have it. Too cool, eh? Krazi dropped to the ground
and was totally useless for any further clues, God bless him. I
finally had to give in to my intuition and to the others I said,
"I have this feeling that I have to call my bro in on this
one. You see, he has his 'beloved' which can do marvels truly
good and truly evil. It just depends on which side of the bed you
get out of."
And so it was agreed upon that I radio Doktor Death aka
THEDARKONE.
"Skwak....Krack...Uh, What's up Dok?"
TheDarkOne
a long time ago far far away.....
Posted 2-6-2002 07:51
It all began over
5000 years ago on a world known as aiaG.
The sky is black and brooding, lighting streaked out through the
sky as the black sun rose to its peak in the sky. Gathered round
a blazing fire, six lonely figures dressed in long flowing robes,
two in black, representing the Dark order of the "Diamonites".
Two in grey, the men who followed their own path niether good or
evil, existing on a plane of magic between the two worlds...
(a GREYZONE) and finally two in white from the clan Goodygoodies
I don't know what thier deal is?
They were chanting mystical rituals, calling on thier different
gods, calling apon a force so powerful that it would mean the end
of all existance! Why did they do this thing? What would be the
end results of this conjuring? Who could stop this maddness
before its too late?
The chanting grew louder and louder the flames seemed to burn
higher with every word. The flames
moved with a life of thier own flickering around the six men like
evil fingers, dancing in the air.
Clouds gathered above thier heads and although there was no rain
the lighting intensified, exploding from the sky and stricking
the ground near where they stood.
One voice rose above the others booming in a gutteral voice
"THE TIME HAS COME THE END IS NEAR! APART WE ARE NOTHING BUT
TOGETHER THE FORCES OF GOOD, EVIL AND NATRALITY SHALL BRING ABOUT
THE END OF ALL THINGS!" This spurs the rest of them into a
chanting frenzy "oooommmmm lala rara bingbang oooommmmmm
keke kaka dingdang" so on and so on....
The one who spoke stepped toward the fire raising his arms as if
to embrace the flames. At the same time the others began dancing
and flayling thier arms out wildly. The one in the middle began
to speak "HEAR ME LORDS OF LIGHT AND DARKNESS I CALL UPON
YOUR POWER!" The energy was building to it's peak as the
spell was almost complete when suddenly from the darkness came a
terrible war cry that sent shivers down thier spines.
In a flash she was there slamming the two in white robes heads
together and befor they could hit the ground she had taken out
two more but still the big man continued to chant, the glow of
the mystic fire burned so brightly it lite up the darkend noon
day sky.
The final man fell with a banana sticking out of his chest now
only one remained she turned to face
him and then he knew that he had failed in his mission for the
one who stood before him was that of legend only spoken of in
hushed whispers in corners of dimly lit bar rooms after hours
with the doors locked and the shades pulled.... yes the one he
now faces is known as... "The Rightful Dude" known in
some circles as "THE DEMONS MONKEY"
With banana in hand she takes a step towards him, she knew, he
knew that all hope was lost so he dropped to his knees to beg for
mercy. But, The Rightful Dude had bigger things to deal with much
bigger... The energy that was summond was now beginning to grow
out of control! But she was prepared for this she knew from birth
that she was destined to save the world, she had lived her life
preparing for this moment, quickly she ran back into the shadows
and moments later she reappeared with a large metal box in hand.
She ran up to the fire opened the box and began to chant a spell
that would trap the enery and hold it dorment inside untill the
FINAL CONFLICT when the planets will once again align and the
time will come for the three primal forces come together to
decide the fate of all that will ever be.....
(fast forward 5011 years later)
I couldn't believe my ears, was that swine trying to contact me?!?!
What could this mean? Suddenly it dawned on me HE was the one who
stoled my pants!!! Blast em! Yes I'm here, I'm here!
What do you want?!?!
~ Midges in
Space ~
(Part 3)
greyzone
Greyzone - wheelin & dealin again
Posted 2-10-2002 02:27
Skwak....Krack
"Hey Dark bro! How's it goin dude?" I thought this
might make him curious. "Heard any bad jokes lately, like
who's yer mother? hahaha" That should get his attention if
he don't get the clue. Sheesh, and he thinks I'm a nincompoop,
he's probably as thick as his ol man.
"This is a right handy little yak gizmo that you, or the
Svensons must have lost, and it is a mighty big coincidence that
I should happened to have found it! Finders sellers, losers
buyers, eh? >}-) I'll make ya a deal, and I'm being generous
bro, cause one way or the other it's all the same, but ya may's
well get somethin evil fer yourself out of it, cause, at least
that's better than nothin under the circumstances." That's
always a good hook on him. "It's not gonna cost ya any hard
currency, but it could cost ya yer life!" That'll really get
his interest! hahahaha >}-D
"Here's the problem, two actually, these folks I've been
hangin with the last while, are unreal, that is to say they
aren't really Gypsies and I know what they're up to. Also, those
indians you're hangin with aren't really indians and I think I
know what they're up to too. What we have here Dok are REAL
POSERS! And these real posers are posing a REAL PROBLEM! It would
be in your best interest to find some way to split and get yer
dark butt over here with the Svenson Clan, cause you all and us
together bro, we have the solution and it's in this weird box
that we found! But I got to admit that we... er that is I...uh
no, us all....aHACKK....sorry, I just choked there, need you and
your 'beloved' to crack this thing open."
"And the second problem is, we have to keep these posers
from getting together and having a BRAWL TO BEAT ALL BLOODY
BRAWLS!!! So are ya with us, for once, and I won't bug ya again
bro? I swear. And you can get back to turning the sun yer
favourite colour."
"If so, let me know what yer wearin' Dok cause I wouldn't
want to mistake you fer one of them posers!! Make no mistake,
we're armed and dangerousy disposed to shoot first and ask
questions later!!
10, 4 up yer back door charlie!" Skwak....Krack
Swack....Krack "Oh, by the way. Some dude here who calls
himself The Prone Stranger found the coolest pair of pants you
could never possibly imagine. He seems to believe that they
belong to a dastardly villain named Dead Eye Dok, that he is
tracking and that he has a very fiendish weapon he calls a 'dead
eye dok shredder'. Is that what you call yer 'beloved' now?
Muahahaha. >}-)" Skwack....Krack
DMonkey
MIDGES IN SPACE...(The Next Part)
Posted 2-21-2002 12:39
What's that sound...something
moving around...hhmmm...Kinda like a cosmic scraping sound, the
sky is BLACK...with a crack of light, jagged like a frozen
lightening bolt. Time stood backwards, like a half forgotten
memory, a distant past...
Another sound, Swak Krak...Swak Krak...a mortal sound, yea, kinda
annoying...Swak Krak...real annoying...Swak Krak! And persistant...Swak
Krak...!
greyzone
Mexican jumping box??
Posted 2-28-2002 03:39
"GREYZONE!
GREYZONE! HEY SMART ASS YER FLY'S OPEN!" Kwazi was trying to
get my attention. "Come here quick!! This is TOOOOOO WEIRD!!!"
I crammed the radio in my belt and scrambled over to see what the
to-do was all about! Now you gotta know that I've never seen
Kwazi anything but cool so this must be a real blister!
I found all of them standing around in stunned amazement, except
for Kwazi, of course, with their mouths hanging wide open, as if
their tongues had a particular intelligence to comprehend the
phenomina before our eyes, and I too, realized that my tongue was
drying in the wind.
Our mysterious chest, which we had so much trouble moving, was
noticeably rocking back and forth and bouncing ever so slightly,
up and down! Have you ever seen a mexican jumping bean? Well
kinda like that.
At that exact same moment, the sun focused it's first ray on
Krazi who jumped up with a yelp, "OUCH! Enough! Enough! I'm
not goin to eat any more! Eat it yerself! Bleachh! I hate spinach!!"
Kwazi rushed to him and batted him about the ears and said "Yer
Ma's not here kid! It's just a little indegestion. You made a bit
of a pig of yerself in the pot last night."
"No Pops! That ain't it! There's something inside that box
doin' weird things to my head, and is threatening me with another
bowl of spinach if I don't do somethin about opening the "flippen"
box! That's it! She said "flippen"! And it is
definitely a SHE!"
I asked myself, "What's keeping the Dok? I would hate to
think he's done himself an injury....MUAHAHAhaha.... No! Not now
Grey! Bad thought, you really need him and his "beloved"."
Skwak...Krack..."Maybe that's him on the phone!"
'Hello, you have reached Greyzone. If you wish to speak Ingles,
punch #1 on your pad; if you wish to speak English, forget it; if
you wish to use expletives, please hang up and call back after
the kids have gone to bed; if you are getting stressed, breathe
in .....breathe out; if you are loading a gun, please hang up and
call a distress hotline; otherwise please leave a message after
the tone....... <<<KABOOOOMMMMmmmmm.....'
TheDarkOne
finaly!!!
Posted 3-30-2002 03:35
Whats this? You
call me then you hang up, well luckily I have an ID caller on my
little gizmo. Well you swine what do you have to say for
yourself? Have you decided to ransom my pants? Is that it?
Well you'll have to try harder then that to get one up on me! So
I'll be waiting for your call....damn answering machines!-|
greyzone
HA!!
Posted 3-30-2002 05:52
ohboy, oh boy, oh boy.....hehe
greyzone
GZ's fair deal
Posted 4-2-2002 03:27
Damn machines! Man!
Technology sucks! Just when you really need it the most... it
blows up!! >}-[
KWAAAAZIII!!! Come here! I want you to go on a very important,
but dangerous mission.. Somehow, sneak on over to where the Dok
and the Svensons are hanging, and tell them what's happening
about the box an all. Pretend your an in-law of the Dok's, or
something, but get them back here pronto!
Oh, and hey, maybe you should take some kind of 'incentive',
extortion kind of. Let's see.....hmmmmmm...Ya! Get those pants
off the Prone Stranger and lure the Dok. But he thinks he's
really clever, so...hmmmmm... I've got it! Split the pants in two
along the seam and tell him, "half now and half when he
finishes the job!!" HAHAHA >}-)))
KwaziMojo
Kwazi's secret mission
Posted 4-2-2002 03:31
"Aye, aye lieutenant! Toute suite!......AHH...ah...AHGROOOOIEEEEEEE...burp.
Scuse!" So I packed my bag and trundled off grumbling to
myself, "Sheesh! Has he ever become a smart ass ever since
they made him a lieutenant in the KISS ARMY! Some army! Too many
chiefs and not enough indians, I say!! But no one listens to
Kwazi...*snif*....hey!...*snif, snif*...What's that I hear?...*snif*
My peculiar sense of hearing has picked up the smell of a number
of life-forms. Must be the indian camp where the Dok is holed up.
Something behind me made a noise, "Ahem".
"ACCKKK!!", I shouted in a fit of...well...surprise!!
"Who You?" This really big mean dude growled.
"Ahhh....my name is....err..I am....that is to say....*think
dammit, who the hell am I*....oh ya! My name is Professor
Dumkopf, and I was just passing through the neighbourhood and I
heard that a relative of mine was near here somewhere. Actually
he's not exactly a relative, thank god, but he's an in-law, a
gent by the name of Doktor Death. Always good to have a doktor in
the family *nudge, nudge, wink, wink*....ahhh, that's a joke sir.
"You come with me! You smell odd." My guess this must
have been the chief. "What's in your bag?, he asked.
"Oh, nuthin, just a toothbrush and a change of undies.",
I lied.
"Ughh!", he replied then pointed to this bedraggled
looking dude with a patch over his eye, "Him your man, take
him away! Far Away, and his midgets too!!!"
"Toute suite chief! Hey Dok!!! Grab yer stuff and run!!!
This way!!"
TheDarkOne
meanwhile back at camp...
Posted 4-29-2002 10:48
After a hasty get
away from those crazy indians,we made our way back to camp
through the thick
follage that grew all about the foothills.
The Svens were less annoying then usual although we did loss one
along the way (oh well what's one Sven, give or take?)
The strange guy that came for me was....well...strange!
He didn't say much along the way, I think it was all he could do
not to crack up laughing at me
wearing half a pair of pants! Oh that swine Greyzone! All I can
say is that he better cough up the
other half when this whole mess is over with!
After all the rushing about to get here he leaves me standing
about waiting........................
...............Hmmmhmmm.......................... Well there you
are its about time! So what's all
this about anyway seems you have some sort of problem with a box
of all things? Well what can my beloved and I do to help?
greyzone
A tearful reunion or, I laughed til I cried
Posted 5-2-2002 04:02
By thunder an
lightning!!! Is that really you my bro?!? he....hehe....HAHAHAHaaSNORT....hahahehehe....
Nice outfit Dok, did the indians try to scalp yer pants?? ehehe....oh...sorry,
I couldn't help it I am really overjoyed to see you and the Sven
clan again... yeah that's it, overjoyed. >}-)))
By Cats and Dogs you almost made me forget, come mit me qvickly
over here!! Would ya look at that box! It's been bouncing up an
down worse an worse since sunup and making all sorts of horrible
screeching! We'll have to get The Prone Stranger's Horse, Pronto,
to sit on it, and I won't give away your secret identity cause
he's lookin for you, the horse that is, he's the smart one. Can
you hook up your 'beloved' to this thing somehow and figure out
how to open it?? We don't have much time, and as a bonus, the
legend says, "He, or she, whosoever should open this box
will be The Rightful Dude!!" Can ya handle that?!?
Anything we can do to help, let us know!
greyzone
And a Monkey Shall lead them!
Posted 10-20-2002 05:41
So Dok Death got the Svensons
to unload and help the Dok to set up his `beloved'. In the mean
time while the Dok was pre-occupied, Grey asked Kwazi what kept
them.
"He just keeps disappearing! Maybe it's the beckoning of the
KISS Women, or doing a little mischief on Planet Jendell...I
dunno, but he can disappear just like that!"
"Like what, exactly Kwazi?"
"Like ((((POOF)))). Like as if the MOOKS were after him!! I
didn't see any though...not surprising cause they look a lot like
the no-seeums!"
"Well pass the word around Kwazi, to keep a good eye on him.
Can't afford any POOFS today."
To watch the Dok and his `beloved' was truly mesmerizing. The
skill and efficiency that brought cursing and howling from the
Svensons was a treat! And for just a moment we were all so
enthralled that we didn't even see that the Dok was missing!
Pronto sounded the alarm! Even though his `beloved' was still
setting up `plug-and-play' with the mysterious box, Dok and the
Svensons were missing!! But before we could organize a search
party, Dok and the Svensons wandered back into camp with
noticeable relief on their faces, and some of the Svenson's
zippers were open.
Kwazi is right, this is all too fiendish, very dark legerdemain,
how can we ensure that he'll...BUZZZZZzzzzzzzz......whiiiIIIRRRRRRrrrrrr.....!
Well I'll be... `beloved' is warming to the experienced movements
of the Dok's pale and slender fingers caressing her keyboard....creating
together the music that soars to the Heavens and descends to the
very depths of the Pit! The deft movement of the rat cupped
lightly, yet firmly in the hand, moving in circles and loop-de-loops
on Sven Svenson's backside. Even Kwazi was impressed at the art,
neither too high, or too low, but verily a masterpiece of....of...
BUZZZZZzzzzzzzz......whiiiIIIRRRRRRrrrrrr..........click..click....KLICK!
The world stood still....time stood still...space stood till...it
was deafening...
Silently the the angles aligned themselves with the curves, the
strange anthropomorphic figures began to dance...forming a
pattern, following a rhythm....
Put yer left foot in,
take yer left foot out.
Put yer right foot in,
and shake it all about,
and do the hokey pokey
and do the hokey pokey
And that's what it's all about!
Dok was the first to move. He heard that the lock had opened and
rushed to get his `beloved' out of harm's way. But no sooner was
he about to detach the last cable, he was caught on the lid of
the box as it flew open, and with the force of a ballistic
missile, it launched Dok and his `beloved' out of the EYE, and
into the storm that was still swirling around them! Awwww...the
stuff of great romance!
To this day, we can always wonder about Dok Death....
But back to the trunk! After watching Dok go into orbit, they
found, staring out of the box, the fiercest, skankiest, foulest
specimen of an ape...utterly flippen demonic!! ...Hey!....Flippen??.....
"FLIPPEN HELL! WHAT TOOK YA SO FLIPPEN LONG AND WHERE IN THE
JUNGLE ARE WE?!?"
"It's thedemonsmonkey!" shouted Greyzone in stunned
disbelief.
Suddenly, as if the camp was hit by a piece of space junk, maybe
even a comet, the explosion of light and sound was almost
unbearable, and once again, the voice from the sky said, " I
told you, whosoever solves the riddle of the chest shall be the
Rightful Dude! Well obviously thedemonsmonkey solved it first, so
therefore, thedemonsmonkey is the Rightful Dude!"
greyzone
Just Desserts
Posted-Nov 20.02
It was a right fine hullabaloo!
There was much jumping up and down and shaking of hands and
kissing faces - well maybe I exaggerate there, who’d want to
kiss a horse - tears flowing and noses running, and hankys flying!
Greyzone was the first to tumble out of his trance and approached
his old friend who was throwing a fit and all sorts of rotten
banana peels too!!
“Monkey! Monkey! Monkey!” he soothed in his best Cary
Grant imitation. It’s not like they had all the time in the
world cause it was just as likely that they had all the time in
Oblivion, and the sooner ol DM got fed, humoured, waited on and
spoiled, the sooner they could get to the job at hand. Remember
The Convergence? Besides he wanted to know all about the strange
box and by now DMonkey should know something about it.
“Kwazi! Rustle up some grubs for ol DM! Hey KWAZI….KWAAAAZZIII!!
Yer fly’s open!” That should get through to him. It’s
an old Dok trick.
“aahhHHHHHMULIGATIINNnnyyy…HOOOPA!…..burp. Scusi
moi! By The Powers That Be Grey! Do you see what I see? It’s
the fulfilment of the Ancient Prophecy, “And a Monkey Shall
Lead Them”! At which point Kwazi succumbed to a religious
experience and fell at the feet of DM, and as it happened Monkey
was shocked to normalcy at the sight of Kwazi paying obeisance to
the cracked claws on her royal toes. “EEEEK! A FREEK”
Grey saw his opportunity to ask Monkey about the box. “Hey
DM! What’s in that there box?”
“Don’t ask me, it was too flippen dark! What do you
expect when the lid falls on ya! But it weren’t so much
anything to see, but stuff I could hear! Lotsa secrets…ouuuuuu,
lots an lotsa them!! Last thing I heard before someone turned on
the lights, was Dok Death holding on for dear life to his ‘beloved’
and all the Svenson’s holding on to him, planning to come
out of orbit! And according to THE PLAN, he should be coming down
just beyond those hills to the west of here, about half past
three this afternoon.”
Well by this time everyone except Kwazi had come to their
respective senses and the collective wisdom dawned on them that
their true purpose in life was just over them hills thar.
Everyone and the horse knew what had to be done, so with grim
determination they packed up the camp, made sure the fire was out
and plodded as a ragged group to their Just Desserts. Yes
desserts. After all, how could you convince them to do anything
unless there was something gooey in it?
It was but the strangest walk. As they moved so did the EYE of
the Tempest, but that was really a problem because there was not
a single sign of critters. Not even just one little grub to eat,
and the crew were beginning to grumble about whether the dessert
was just nothing but a carrot on a string. On they pressed, some
looking at each step they took as the rhythm was hypnotic and
numbed all feeling inside and out. The Pronto and the others kept
an eye on the horizon and watched the hills approach ever so
slowly, but to them progress was it's own drug… Eventually
they all achieved a mechanical stupor, except for Kwazi who was
enamoured with The Demon’s Monkey who was too busy swatting
him away to be paying much attention the trek.
As the morning turned into the afternoon no one was the wiser but
the sand was getting into everyone’s undies and the heat was
almost breaking the hypnosis, in fact it was li’l Krazi Mojo
that all of a sudden turned downright cranky and brought it to
everyone’s attention, “Hey! What kind of Just Dessert
is this? This ain’t that, this is just a desert!!!”
“We been had!!” was the collective response! And to
make it worse there was no sign of the hills! Can you imagine how
disoriented they must have been. They felt like they could be
anywhere…anytime…anyplace….ANYBODY! How frightful!
Greyzone was beginning to suspect he was Pronto, and Pronto was
getting the dreadful feeling that he was the Prone Ranger!
Everyone was starting to have an identity crisis! Everyone was
becoming everyone else! How very confusing! Like the hurricane
swirling around them their identities were spinning faster and
faster and were beginning to all merge together! But the
metamorphosis was somehow incomplete and they were frustratingly
stuck! This could only be the work of the Gypsies, or maybe the
Indians, or maybe The Convergence was beginning!!!
If only they could think of what’s missing!! Someone is
missing, but they merged too much to distinguish much of one body
part from another! This must be THE END and Dok is going to miss
it…..That’s it! Dok Death is missing! Dok is the
missing link! We’re doomed! Dok could have bought the farm,
as I hear mortgage rates have plummeted. Or he could be halfway
to the next star! Or he could have…..[[[[ FLASHHHH ]]]]……KABOOOOOOooooommmmmmm…..(((
POOOOFF )))
“NINCOMPOOPS!!”
greyzone
THE END… (?)
Dec.4.02
The twister dropped the motley crew like mouldy spuds at the shock of a dramatic entrance by none other than….hey! “Is that you Dok?…Dok?? Yer fly’s open Dok!…..”
Some slightly groggy and shaken voices penetrated out of the cloud of dust, who were also dropped, like fleas from a dog, “nincompoops…What do ya mean…me? Or are ya talking to buffy?” “Not me dearest bro, jerk, I think you have me confused with sven svenson, or is it sven svensonson?” As their dust started to settle, and along with it, what remained of their brains, they made the startling discovery that it wasn’t Dok Death at all that they had a hold of, but that it was his ‘beloved’ that had half of his pants tangled in a few cables, and that Dok was not to be seen!!
Everyone was sooo stunned! Such dashed expectations…I mean a moment of silence didn’t even require declaring, no one had the capacity to think let alone utter any expletives….er condolences. But as fate would have it, everyone got their identities back. Nothing like a little of Dok’s famous shock therapies to save the day, or what was left of it.
“muahaHAHAHAHAhahaha…” I am MOOK!”
It says right here in the book – I am MOOK, you are MOOK, they are MOOK, we are MOOK and in the ‘ancient’, MOOKO, MOOKATUS, MOOKAT, MOOKAMUS!!”
“HORRORS!!!” cried the motley crew! “HORRORS!!!” cried the svensons! And all looking at each other, “HORRORS!!! This must be THE END!!” they all cried together! From the frying pan into the fire!! I mean who needs this now? Like it isn’t bad enough losing the Dok! It is the MOOK of Tutti MOOKI! It is the BOSS MOOK from the flip side of the equation (or was that the ‘b’ side)! GASP! It is the Low God of MOOK!!
But li’l Krazi Mojo stood up to the grand goofus of all the MOOKS and quoted one of his favourite heros, “Eyah, what’s up Dok?”
“Dok has been assimilated, therefore Dok is MOOK. After all, it was Dok’s distant relative that resurrected MOOK, that’s me, by being the first to utter the name since the fall of the Old Empire. It’s an old trick taught to the Egyptians and the Indians so long ago.” was the polite reply, “and being that you asked so nicely, is there anything I can do for you? You have but ONE WISH!”
“A MEETING!” cried Greyzone’s mob! “A MEETING!” cried the svenson mob! They all looked at each other and the MOB (Mighty Odd Bunch) cried out, “A MEETING!” They all huddled together, but that wouldn’t work cause there was too many of them to get within whispering range…don’t want no MOOKs to hear in case there were any misunderstandings, at least until they arrived at a unanimous ‘wish’ and that’s expecting the impossible! So they did like they do in football, they all piled on each other and commenced to begin. The Demon’s Monkey with the strange chest (the trunk that is) and Dok’s ‘beloved’ on the bottom – the place of the most importance, and Grezone next, then Kwazi and Krazi, then sven and buffy, then Pronto! Everyone else fought for the remaining positions. What a hoot!
They tossed up a wish list that included, shrimp, caviar, double malt scots whiskey, banana cream pie, a large feedbag of fortified oats, clean undies, a quick shower, a KISS Kondom…what?!?! Sheesh, that one was the first to go…and more serious things like a golfcart, a nap, a map and compass, a new mother board, an ending to this….What? THE END?!?! That one was thrown off too! Which brought them around to the reason that got them into this in the first place – The CONVERGENCE!
So Greyzone said to them, all that were still listening, “Everything on your wishlist will just be a wish if we don’t prevent this ‘Convergence’, So I think we should run all this though ‘beloved’ here and work out THE PLAN! That’s it!!! We wish for THE PLAN!!! But hey! We already have THE PLAN, then I think at this point, what we need is THE PLOT! Let’s ask the MOOK for THE PLOT as he seems to know something about Egyptians and Indians, and run it through on ‘beloved’ for a second opinion, after all a MOOK by any other name is still a MOOK, and we still don’t have a clue what a MOOK is. But at this point we have to trust something, so we’ll trust ‘beloved’!”
The MOB all cried out, “WOOHOO!!”
So Krazi Mojo was chosen to be the diplomat and present the wish to MOOK.
“Ahem….schoouuukhh…urp! Scusi moi.” Spoke li’l Krazi.
“HUH?” MOOK was painting his nails black and was surprised at the intelligent interruption.
“We have our wish!” said Krazi.
“FIRE!” said MOOK.
“We thought of that too but ruled it out, cause we don’t have nothing to cook on it” said Krazi.
“No, I mean what is it?”
So Krazi went on to outline the problem what with the ‘Convergence’ an all and said, “So what we really wish is to come up with THE PLOT so that we can all get out of here and put THE END to this absurdity.”
“THE END? A wise wish and fairly put, I think I can help you with that. Give me a mo to finish my nails and I’ll get on it.”
So Krazi went back to hang with the MOB and they all sang songs and told ghost stories waiting for MOOK to do what MOOKs do…well this one anyway. But soon everyone started to fidget and look at their wrists as though they wore watches or something; some drummed their fingers, some tapped their feet, others cleaned their ears, and some went behind the bushes.
Before too long MOOK requested the presence of Krazi, and gave the wee’un THE PLOT. They swapped a few jokes, then as suddenly as MOOK appeared, he was gone…((((POOF))))
Krazi was mobbed, everyone was so anxious to get on with it, and Greyzone looked at THE PLOT but couldn’t make heads or butts out of it, so he gave it to Kwazi, who gave it to Monkey, who gave it to Pronto, who gave it to ‘beloved’, who gave it the once through and was able to make 2 x 2= [the square root of 16]. So it might be legit! The only direction that made any sense to them all was that it, THE PLOT, was to be placed in the strange chest and shaken NOT stirred. And that they did, but it was no easy feet. It took all the MOB over three feet to do it.
Somehow DMonkey was a little upset, actually more than a little, as she reminded her royal self, that ‘Possession was nine tenths of the Law, and the remaining tenth was that it had possessed her! So by rights this was her box!!
“Off with yer heads!” she shouted, “That’s not how to do it!” At that she stomped over to her box and gave it a great boot! The MOB was aghast! They were terrified! What’s got into Her Evilness?!? Just cause she owned the box don’t mean she……whooOOOOOP…wooOOOOOP…wooOOOOOP… Great Powers That Be!! She has triggered the box!
“ I can do that ya know! It’s my box, an besides I almost forgot the most important part, it said I’m THE BOSS – got my own restaurtant and general emporium ya know. An another thing, it’s like I said, I couldn’t see anything in there, because everything was invisible, an the Gypsy woman was able to make Greyzone invisible so that he could find their pokey scouts! Remember? So just watch this!” DM kicked the box again and the lid popped open, obviously that’s how she opened it in the first place. She jumped gracefully in and she disappeared! (((poof))) quiet and discreet like. “GASP!” Was the MOB response! Then Monkey jumped out again. “AWWWW” was the MOB response. “And that is the secret of this box!” Monkey proudly stated.
It was The Demon’s Monkey's turn to get mobbed. She was bodily hoisted on their shoulders and they marched around in circles singing songs and making up stories of Monkey’s greatness for future historians to wonder about in awe! So the penny dropped on Greyzone, and when Monkey came around again, he detoured the MOB and had them march straight to somewhere and have faith that they were going the right way.
As they marched triumphantly, it was noted that the EYE moved along with them, neither right or left, and as such it scared away any moving feast. But this time it was different! They were a MOB! And they had a fearless and unpredictable Leader! So on they marched, and on, and on, until they unexpectedly came upon the edge of a canyon.
The ones in front, like Monkey, Greyzone and sven were almost shoved over, and if it wasn’t for Kwazi and Pronto who was carrying the box, they would have met oblivion prematurely!
“SHEESH!”
“NINCOMPOOPS!!”
“SHHHHHHHH!!”
“HUH?”
“Oh! Look! Down there in the Canyon!” Greyzone was used to this sort of thing. He had a similar experience before. And yes, down at the bottom he could see the Gypsy caravan starting to circle their wagons. Now Greyzone knew that this could mean one of four things: 1. It was time for dindins. 2. They were going to shelter from the strange storm. 3. The Indians were coming. 4. All of the above! So Greyzone decided on 1 and 2. He was about to advise his companions of his considered opinion when he saw a moving cloud of dust heading towards the Gypsies and revised his opinion and went with 4!
“Hey MOB! It’s #4!!” Greyzone whispered loudly. Well Krazi was the only one that could read minds, that’s why he’s the diplomat, and translated to the others that, “IT’S THE CONVERGENCE!!” And Monkey said, “It’s a good day to fry!” And Grey’s bunch said, “It’s a good day for rye!” And the svenson clan said, “It’s a good day for pie!”
And all together, “UP THE APOCALYPSE GANG!!”
At which point the Gypsies’ wagons stopped dead in their tracks, and the Indians’ dust cloud stopped dead in its track, so the Indians had to stop dead in their tracks, cause they just lost their disguise as a dust cloud, and they all stared dumbly into the sky.
At first you could see that they, the Indians and the Gypsies, all were having their doubts, and hearing something about an Apocalypse and NOT a ‘Convergence’, and seeing the EYE in the storm, became very confused! But Damn the Burrittos, these Cosmic Forces had a FINAL MISSION and would not be deterred, PLAN or no PLAN – yes they knew – they know almost everything! So they continued on their fated path of MAD (Mutual Assured Destruction)!
What happened next no one ever knew for sure, but a big wind, or maybe it was a transporter beam, some say an oversized vulture, but in fact it was THE PLOT, picked up the MOB, lock, stock and double barrel, and somehow slapped all sorts of KY jelly on them and stuffed them all into Monkey’s strange box! Now then, according to THE LAW, all things are equal and opposite, and now everybody was confused!! The MOB, the Gypsies, the Indians! But the Indians and the Gypsies were finally about to engage and were not paying any attention except to the job at hand, when the strange box landed right in the middle of it all! Off popped the lid again, and on that unforgettable day, the most disembodied, outrageous, not-quite-obscene shriek that would put any banshee to shame, issued forth from the box! Followed by the howlings and complainings, the cursing and the swearing, not to mention the hideous smell that accompanied it all! But above all, like out of thin air, or in the case of the Indians and the Gypsies as they tell it, The EYE, appeared the Shiva of all Demon Monkeys! No greater wrath hath a Demon Monkey scorned!
The Indians and the Gypsies knew that there was no point anymore. How were they supposed to concentrate on what they were doing in all this racket! They accepted defeat gracefully, well they had to or there would be DMonkey to pay, and that there was the distinct possibility of a greater power than they. And upon that revelation, fell to the ground and begged forgiveness, and promised to be…well, sheesh…good!
After all was forgiven and the MOB finally got their Just Desserts, and Monkey, Grey, Kwazi and sven were peacefully disputing some rule in their game of poker. A sense of quiet satisfaction, like after a good meal, or a snuck smoke out back, or a bad joke just to be a nuisance, had settled around them all…
(((How happy he was, joyfully torturing Doktor Death! How he loved to watch him beg for mercy; it was a wonderfully dark and rainy day. Greyzone could feel the cold breeze blow in through the window of his secret hide out. He loved this time of year and the combination of Dok Death's tortured screams, and the cold chills running down his back was so wonderful that he could hardly stand it! But when he turned and walk back over to his captive, suddenly he realized that it wasn't that meddling agent that was strapped to the table, no it was Greyzone himself that was being tortured, and Doktor Death was standing over him poking him with a stick! No this can’t be! He was so close... so close... so…))) So this is THE END.
(but who was that EYE?)
>}-)
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